Friday, May 23, 2014

anniversary ceremonies (the things we cannot incinerate so we lie)

anniversary ceremonies (the things we cannot incinerate so we lie)

Why would you shatter somebody like me

My memory drives the people in my life crazy because I remember everything, always, in exacting detail. My memory was a gift until it became a curse, until no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t forget things I desperately needed to forget so I might survive.
An Untamed StateRoxane Gay


this weekend returns each sunny May
billowing smoke that forces me to lie

#

first i had to gather everything
in order to shred it all carefully

i formed a frame with six sticks
where the pyre smoldered to soot

the smell lingered reminding me
of melting 1000 pennies or dreams

this is how i turn from year to year
collecting ash to ash for the rising

because there are thunder and storms
in springtime leaving a blanket of hail

#

the heart is not flame retardant Kevlar
and memories never work as kindling

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